Boundaries are knowing where I begin and where I end,
and inhabiting that space with love.
Everyone I talk to including myself, my partner, friends and healing clients are actively working to heal codependency. This means in part, boundary work. It is time for us to live with natural boundaries that emanate from the core of our self love.
I had an epiphany last year while was receiving a healing from my teacher. I experienced what it feels like to love yourself because when I was near her I found myself loving her, respecting her boundaries, and loving myself more. Her self love communicated something to my soul in that moment. I realized that boundaries are essentially self love.
I felt that natural boundaries do not have to be enforced with force because they emanate from a harmonious alignment with a person’s inner most being. This is a kind of subtle embodiment. The love one feels for one’s self fills out to the edges of interaction with the world. Rather than creating friction it communicates love and therefore love is received in return. It reminds me of one of my favorite quotes.
“Love is essentially self – communicative; those who do not have it catch it from those who have it. Those who receive love from others cannot be it’s recipients without giving a response that, in itself, is the nature of love.”
Meher Baba, Discourses p. 9
I've noticed for myself and in my relationships with friends that when we first begin learning boundaries we put a lot of force behind them. The fierceness behind these boundaries causes discord and more pain in our relationships. The quality of a false boundary is rigid, hard, forceful and can feel harsh to us and the people who we are in relationship with. Our heart wants harmony and cooperation with others but we feel we have to impose boundaries to take care of ourselves.
True boundaries rooted in self love are not rigid and fixed. They emanate the essence and sweetness of love which automatically relates in harmonious and cooperative interaction with the world around you.
Vibrational healing is one way to support your self love and boundaries that emanate from the essence of your being.
It doesn't have to be painful or confusing to have natural boundaries. It can come easily and with joy.